On a night quite unenchanting, when the rain was downward slanting,
I awakened to the ranting of the man I catch mice for.
Tipsy and a bit unshaven, in a tone I found quite craven,
Poe was talking to a Raven perched above the chamber door.
"Raven's very tasty," thought I, as I tiptoed o'er the floor,
"There is nothing I like more"
Soft upon the rug I treaded, calm and careful as I headed
Towards his roost atop that dreaded bust of Pallas I deplore.
While the bard and birdie chattered, I made sure that nothing clattered,
Creaked, or snapped, or fell, or shattered, as I crossed the corridor;
For his house is crammed with trinkets, curious and weird decor
Bric-a-brac and junk galore.
Still the Raven never fluttered, standing stock-still as he uttered,
In a voice that shrieked and sputtered, his two cents' worth -"Nevermore.
While this dirge the birdbrain kept up, oh, so silently I crept up,
Then I crouched and quickly leapt up, pouncing on the feathered bore.
Soon he was a heap of plumage, and a little blood and gore -
Only this and not much more.
"Oooo!" my pickled poet cried out, "Pussycat, it's time that I dried out!
Never sat I in my hideout talking to a bird before;
How I've wallowed in self-pity, while my gallant, valiant kitty
Put an end to that damned ditty" - then I heard him start to snore.
Back atop the door I clambered, eyed that statue I abhor,
Jumped - and smashed it on the floor.
Is there something I'm not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?
Why doesn't the government do something about dogs?
I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ulterior motives?
Hmmm ... If dogs serve humans, and humans serve cats, why can't we cats ever get these stupid dogs to do anything for us?
This looks like a good spot for a nap.
Hey -- no kidding, I'm sure that's the can opener.
Would humans have built a vast and complex civilization of their own if we cats hadn't given them a reason to invent sofas and can openers in the first place?
If there's a God, how can He allow neutering?
If that really was the can opener, I'll play finicky just to let them know who's boss!
A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide
me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me...
They must be gods!
A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide
me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... I
must be a god!
Top 5 reasons to take you cats with you on vacation
They will starve if left home alone.
You love having cat hair on your clothes so much, you thought you would share it with your car pool buddies for the next year, since it is impossible to remove from the car seats.
You really want to have cat litter in your soda while driving.
The dash needed a few claw marks.
So when stoped for doing 90 you can say ""I'm sorry officer, but I need to have my cat surgically removed from my leg. Where is the nearest hospital?"
In the beginning God created the Heaven and the Earth. On the fifth day he created the cat but,
unlike today, the cat was without fur.
This was fine for awhile; it was cool in the summer and easy to keep clean. Plus there were no
problem with hair balls.
After a while other animals with fur started to tease this hairless creature. They would sing, "Ha,
ha, the hairless cat, the hairless cat is ugly and fat!"
"Oh how beautiful the other animals are with their colorful coats of fur," thought the hairless cat.
Soon the cat forgot the songs and was proud again, for it was beautiful in its own way.
Then winter came and it got cold. The cat tried to keep warm, he curled up under bushes and with
other animals, but was not as warm as his friends.
When the cat tried to find warm places to stay, he was never able to get comfortable and was
always getting bumps and scratches.
One cold night as the cat was curled up under a bush and staring at the sky, a rabbit came by.
"Why are you so sad cat?" asked the bunny.
"I have no fur and I am ugly and cold." replied the cat.
The rabbit cuddled next to the cat and whispered to him in his ears, "If you wish on a shooting star,
and believe, your wish can come true."
Just about that time a star glimmered across the sky and the cat knew what to do. The cat closed his
eyes tightly and said, "I wish, I wish I had fur and also all other cats of the world had beautiful
coats of fur like other animals."
The cat opened his eyes just in time to see the star vanish behind the moon.
A few seconds later the moon began to glow as brightly as the sun and cats all over the world came
out of hiding to see the bright light. On the other side of the world, there stood two cats that were
greatly frightened and hid deep in a cave somewhere far away.
As the light faded, fur began to grow on the cat. Within minutes the cat and all other cats had
beautiful coats of fur. Some long, some short, and of different colors. Deep in the cave shivered the
two scared cats. These cats did not see or feel the light, so no hair grew on them.
From then on, the cat was not teased or cold. And the fur also protected the cat from injuries.
Today all cats have fur except for the descendants of those two poor cats that hid. These cats grew
in Great Britain and was given the breed name of "Rex," which means "timid."
Poe's Cat